it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
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