The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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