This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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