All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Randomize