Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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