Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
