stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
Randomize
