HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
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As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
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cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
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