Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
When he came he kept saying "oh god oh god" and he sounded just like his dad. awkward...
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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