she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
