I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
