Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
Randomize
