I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
