Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I know you've been in hospital with meningitis, but last night I walked into a streetlight and bruised my penis so who's really suffering here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
Randomize