guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize