Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
