it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
