at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
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Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
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