Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Randomize