i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
