So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We need to get me chipped asap
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
