I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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