i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
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