Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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