and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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