Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
