So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
