Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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