Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
