I just threw up on my dentist
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
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