Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
