I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
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