Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
Randomize
