If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
