I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize