Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
