Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
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