Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
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