I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
Randomize
