The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
