He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Randomize