she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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