So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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