dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
