Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Church boner. Awkwardddd
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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