Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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