My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
