Porn is love you can see.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
