I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
Randomize
