I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
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