no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
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